Tonight a cold front has moved through the Northeast, and suddenly it feels like fall outside, which is always just fine with me. If there’s one thing I detest (and longtime readers will know that’s something of a lowball estimate), it’s a hot September. But right now there’s a cool, crisp breeze coming through the open window, and after the beastly summer we’ve all been through, it is very refreshing indeed.
Meanwhile, the little clash-of-civilizations drama that has had everyone all wound up of late has descended into low comedy. Terry Jones, the tinpot Florida preacher who absurdly set the world on fire by threatening to do the same to a few leaves of paper, is now jerking his captive world-wide audience back and forth like a yo-yo as he waffles about whether he’s actually going to Do the Deed or not. As I understand the latest dispatches, he either did, or did not, make some sort of arrangement with Feisal “Good Cop” Rauf about the location of that triumphal mosque, in consideration of which he might, or might not, be willing to stay his hand, thereby sparing the world further (yawn) Muslim ire. World leaders, media titans, and the commanders of the world’s mightiest army tremble with helpless anxiety as an utterly insignificant little pisher from Gainesville toys with a book of matches.
I don’t think I have ever seen anything like it in my 54 years.
The latest update seems to be that the august Mr. Rauf, saintly builder of bridges, uniter of riven cultures, America’s official knight-errant of tolerance, and a man without an ulterior bone in his body, isn’t about to let this malignant little mountebank, this upstart farceur, this small-bore sky-pilot, upset his protection racket — in which the “deeply sensitive” Imam, though yearning with all his heart to move his triumphal 9/11 victory mosque somewhere else to ease America’s spiritual anguish, must sadly keep it right where it is for the sake of “national security”. Mr. Jones, therefore, seems likely once again to be making his incendiary statement on Saturday.
I know what you are thinking: this has really gone beyond absurdity; it is a disgraceful media and political circus. What we need is a wise and sober figure, some universally respected solon of unimpeachable sagacity and gravitas, to discipline these squabbling children, and bring this whole embarrassing mess to a swift and dignified conclusion.
Wait! Our prayers may have been answered. We have just learned that Donald Trump has waded into the fray, and will soon put things to rights.