Retard And Catch

By now you probably know that the high-flying New York Jets, en route to Dallas, were brought down Sunday night by a severe patch of turbulence over Pittsburgh — the result, perhaps, of an expanding pocket of hot air that had lingered in the team’s vicinity for several weeks.

In case you missed the game, I have stumbled across what is, I am sure, the most detailed and informative account you are likely to find anywhere on the Internet. It comes from something called the Temple Daily Telegram.

Some excerpts:

For the third time in six seasons, terrible Towels will whisk during the Super Bowl, where the Steelers will confront Green Bay after silencing Rex Ryan’s mad wreath in a 24-19 attainment for the AFC championship Sunday.

Look out big D, here comes another big D – in black and gold, and with an unmatched story of carrying off the Lombardi Trophy.

The Steelers (14-4) in addition will defence the Packers, who have been 2?-point favorites, with a versatile dispute led by their quarterback and regulating at a behind of Rashard Mendenhall.

The defense, led by James Harrison, had a destroy relapse for a touchdown and a goal-line mountain that tighten down the Jets’ remark in the fourth quarter. it will definitely examination Aaron Rodgers in the due diversion in Arlington on Feb. 6.

Got that, Rodgers? You’d better hit the books.

The Steelers just did what they had to do:

“It’s not continually graceful with us,” Roethlisberger said, “but we do the job.”

The Steelers accomplished the Jets’ mellow with a drawn out primary half for a 24-3 lead. Mendenhall had 95 of his 121 yards and a touchdown.

…“God is good and this one was for Steelers fans,” Roethlisberger said. “I’m unquestionably haughty of the way we came out and inspected us tonight.”

The Steelers have been regulars, together with Super Bowl titles for the 2005 and 2008 teams, both led by Roethlisberger and a impassioned salvation sparked by playmaking haven Troy Polamalu.

Polamalu, his enlarged hair arising from under his helmet, didn’t have to do a sum lot this time. Not with the way his teammates topsy-turvy the Jets during the line of onslaught before to a enterprising new York bloat in the second half.

“We overcame a lot some-more obstacles this year than we have in the past,” Polamalu said. “But we still got one some-more to go. ”

And too often, new York’s salvation was like a suspended dike that Roethlisberger and Mendenhall ran by with ease.

As for the hapless Jets:

The Jets struggled to retard and catch, with the usually sure-handed Cotchery origination a pass third-down drop. Or tackle. Mendenhall found seams to the left, right or up the middle. His 35-yard scuttle in the second perform led to Shaun Suisham’s 20-yard domain thought and a 10-0 lead that was unassailable the way the Jets were whiffing.

Read the whole thing (with glamorous photo of Roethlisberger) here.

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6 Comments

  1. Kevin Kim says

    Is this Konglish?

    Posted January 25, 2011 at 12:42 pm | Permalink
  2. Malcolm says

    God only knows. In another article over there I read that Rex Ryan had described one of the Jets as one of the best “city-slickers” on the team. Took me a while to guess that he probably had said “player”.

    Posted January 25, 2011 at 1:38 pm | Permalink
  3. Kevin Kim says

    This sounds almost like an exercise in prank re-translation.

    Posted January 25, 2011 at 3:18 pm | Permalink
  4. Have you heard U.S. Rep. Corrine Brown (D-FL) “gradulate” “corch” Meyers for “corching”? At the U.S. House of Representatives, no less? Here.

    Posted January 25, 2011 at 6:21 pm | Permalink
  5. Eric says

    This is almost certainly a retranslated article. The original article (while certainly not a major work) is here.

    Posted January 31, 2011 at 12:42 pm | Permalink
  6. Malcolm says

    Thanks, Eric. Had a feeling.

    But where’s that great picture?

    Posted January 31, 2011 at 12:48 pm | Permalink