…And Suppose You Were A Member Of Congress

I live in New York’s 11th Congressional District, and so my proxy in the House of Representatives, the champion responsible for advancing my interests in the august councils of this great Republic, is a woman by the name of Yvette Clarke.

Ms. Clarke recently appeared on The Colbert Report. During her brief interview, she was asked: if she were able to go back and speak to the Brooklynites of 1898 (the year Brooklyn was annexed to New York City), what would she say to them?

A partial transcript (starting at 3:54 in the linked clip):

Yvette Clarke: “I would say to them: set me free!”

Stephen Colbert: “From…?”

YC: “Slavery.”

SC: “Slavery. Really. I didn’t realize there was slavery in Brooklyn in 1898.”

YC (knowing nod): “I’m pretty sure there was.”

SC: “Sounds like a horrible part of the United States, that kept slavery going until 1898!”

YC: “Uhhh…”

SC: “Who would be enslaving you, in 1898 in New York?”

YC: “The Dutch.”

SC: “The Dutch. Those sneaky Dutch bastards!”

YC (nodding again): “Exactly.”

SC: “Okay! Excellent.”

Again: that’s New York’s 11th District, folks, if you aren’t satisfied with the representation you’re getting elsewhere.

26 Comments

  1. Just curious … does Yvette Clarke have a high-school diploma? If so, which high school is culpable for such a travesty?

    Posted September 5, 2012 at 4:48 pm | Permalink
  2. BTW, is Yvette Clarke an alias for this cretin? http://hl98.blogspot.com/2009/03/us-rep-corrine-brown-d-fl-gradulates.html

    Posted September 5, 2012 at 4:57 pm | Permalink
  3. Johann Gutenberg says

    I’m rolling over in my grave. Maybe she should read a book or something.

    Posted September 5, 2012 at 8:09 pm | Permalink
  4. Pass the Dutchie on the Left Hand Side says

    As the daughter of immigrants from the West Indies, I don’t know why we should expect Yvette Clarke to know or care when slavery was abolished in America.

    How many white Americans know or care when slavery was abolished in Mrs. Clarke’s home country of Jamaica?

    I honestly didn’t know it was in 1834 before I looked it up.

    Posted September 5, 2012 at 9:07 pm | Permalink
  5. JK says

    So what’re you hinting here Malcolm? Your Democrats’re dumber’n other state’s Democrats?

    (Yes I realize it takes a little more’n forty second verbal exchange but when comparison shopping for votes – be it chicken dinners or pints of vodka – a mere 9 pages of double-spaced legalese ain’t much of a chore.)

    http://posting.arktimes.com/images/blogimages/2012/09/05/1346878786-hallumindict.pdf

    Posted September 5, 2012 at 9:14 pm | Permalink
  6. andy says

    As the daughter of immigrants from the West Indies, I don’t know why we should expect Yvette Clarke to know or care when slavery was abolished in America.

    Holy crap that was stupid.

    How about because she’s an American and a Congressman in *this* country?

    Posted September 5, 2012 at 9:28 pm | Permalink
  7. JK says

    Careful, careful there Andy.

    She’s certainly no Congressman.

    The proper PC [Derb’s Etiquette Manual] is the catchall, “Congress Critter.”

    Posted September 5, 2012 at 9:50 pm | Permalink
  8. Malcolm says

    Henry, it was Brooklyn’s Edward R. Murrow High School, if you can believe it.

    Posted September 5, 2012 at 10:50 pm | Permalink
  9. If Murrow had done the interview, he probably would have swallowed his cigarette.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 1:05 am | Permalink
  10. Alex says

    Is there no limit to the bovine ignorance and grievance-mongering of politicians? I was going to say black politicians, but I’m not sure they’ve cornered the market in dumb opinions.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 1:27 am | Permalink
  11. Apropos:

    [img]http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6KUTi5HO3qA/UD9rn-ckYjI/AAAAAAAB6Gs/fgehACyh0fo/s1600/image001.jpg[/img]

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 2:26 am | Permalink
  12. JK says

    Sorry Alex no, the “Hudson Hallum” mentioned in the linked indictment happens to be white.

    But something really fishy – Mr. Hallum was buying the votes with chicken dinners and cheap vodka. Oh – and he and his co-conspirators were calling the money they were using to pay for both the vodka and chicken with money they called “watermelon.”

    Cheap joke? Wellll… I reckon.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 7:17 am | Permalink
  13. Alex says

    JK: I was referring to Yvette Clarke who is resident in Brooklyn and appears to be black.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 7:42 am | Permalink
  14. the one eyed man says

    Sounds like Yvette Clarke is giving Michele Bachmann a run for her money as least informed member of Congress.

    I think that you can pinpoint last night’s speech by the big dog as the time when the Presidential race made a decisive turn.

    Left unsaid: the Democrats have a former President who is a national hero. The Republicans have a former President they are too ashamed of to have at their convention.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 10:25 am | Permalink
  15. Malcolm says

    Won’t even dignify that with a response, Pete. See you in November.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 11:17 am | Permalink
  16. the one eyed man says

    Pah. Clinton hit the ball out of the park, and you know it.

    Re November: in the fullness of time, the Truth will be revealed to us all.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 12:11 pm | Permalink
  17. Yvette Clarke gives Batshit-crazy Pelosi a run for her money as “best public servant”, in the eyes of a one-eyed jackass.

    There is no question that Bubba, however, is very intelligent, as opposed to the empty-suit poser he campaigns for. Bubba is also likely to be a hero to many men who admire him for being an ass-man extraordinaire. But, given that he was impeached for lying under oath about sticking his cigar in Monica’s twat, only a jackass would claim that he is a national hero.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 12:19 pm | Permalink
  18. Malcolm says

    Keep it civil, please, Henry. I’d prefer that comments here not descend into name-calling.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 12:20 pm | Permalink
  19. Sorry, Malcolm.

    Please make the following changes in my preceding comment:

    “Batshit-crazy” => “Unhinged”

    “jackass” => “Leftist” (2 instances)

    “twat” => “pudendum”

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 12:36 pm | Permalink
  20. oops; also:

    “ass-man” => womanizer

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 12:38 pm | Permalink
  21. “Unhinged” => “certifiable”

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 12:43 pm | Permalink
  22. Malcolm says

    Peter, no question that Bill Clinton is a terrific orator (there’s never much reason to believe a word he says, but boy, does he say it well).

    I couldn’t stay till the end of his speech, however — only had a few days’ worth of food in the house.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 1:18 pm | Permalink
  23. Malcolm says

    Typo corrected. Thank you Peter.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 4:44 pm | Permalink
  24. the one eyed man says

    My pleasure. Pedantry and being annoying form my core competency.

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 4:59 pm | Permalink
  25. According to Urban Dictionary, “pedantry” has the same root as “pederasty”.

    Just sayin’

    Posted September 6, 2012 at 5:43 pm | Permalink
  26. JK says

    Gawd I LOVE this site of yours Malcolm.

    ‘Stead of having to listen to bickering as a captive audience I can read ’em at my convenience.

    And (perhaps best) I don’t have to pay a divorce lawyer.

    Posted September 7, 2012 at 12:18 pm | Permalink

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