Facepalm

Here’s a handy guide from the firearms experts at Rolling Stone:

The 5 Most Dangerous Guns in America

We read:

Contrary to what those who defend the right to own high-powered assault rifles believe, not all guns are created equal. Due to a combination of availability, portability and criminal usage the following five types of guns are the country’s most dangerous.

Here’s the list:

— Pistols

— Revolvers

— Rifles

— Shotguns

— Derringers

Good work, Rolling Stone! Among other things I learned that pistols are “popular among handgun-owners”, and have a “built-in barrel”, that musket balls were often a “bad fit” due to “manufacturing complications”, and that “the explosive that creates the energy to fire the gun occurs in the fixed shell of a shotgun rather than the metallic cartridge of a rifle.” It was also helpful that the authors made clear that “the Glock” is a “short-recoil operated” pistol; I’m sure that Rolling Stone‘s core readership were wondering about this.

I found this piece so helpful, in fact, that I was inspired to provide, as a public service, some lists of other common hazards. After much research, here they are:

The 3 Most Intoxicating Alcoholic Beverages in America:

— Beer

— Wine

— Liquor

The 2 Most Dangerous Pathogens In America:

— Viruses

— Bacteria

The 7 Places Where you Are Most Likely To Drown In America:

— Oceans

— Rivers

— Lakes

— Ponds

— Swimming Pools

— Bathtubs

— Other bodies of water

The 6 Vehicles Most Often Involved In Transportation Mishaps In America:

— Cars

— Buses

— Motorcycles

— Bicycles

— Trains

— Airplanes

I hope this helps. If it saves just one life, it will have been worth it.

11 Comments

  1. The 3 Least Relieble Assurances in America:

    — “The check is in the mail.”

    — “I’ll respect you in the morning.”

    — “Experts at Rolling Stone know shit from Shinola.”

    Posted July 15, 2014 at 5:12 pm | Permalink
  2. D G says

    What about “Assault Weapons”?

    Posted July 15, 2014 at 5:12 pm | Permalink
  3. That’s really funny. The prose in the article is off in a way that makes me suspect the reporter outsourced the piece to someone in a foreign country, but who knows, maybe that’s really how she writes.

    Posted July 15, 2014 at 5:15 pm | Permalink
  4. JK says

    Looks to be I needn’t been concerned Henry, your Hillbilly is coming along quiet nicely.

    Posted July 16, 2014 at 1:58 am | Permalink
  5. Apropos today’s date:

    Trinity — July 16, 1945

    Score one for the Los Alamos Team. A really, really big one.

    Posted July 16, 2014 at 11:56 am | Permalink
  6. JK says

    And, Flight 800.

    (It wasn’t Muammar.)

    Posted July 16, 2014 at 11:54 pm | Permalink
  7. Flight 800 crashed on July 17, 1996.

    Posted July 17, 2014 at 12:42 am | Permalink
  8. “If it saves just one life, it will have been worth it.”

    Too late to save Archie . . .

    Jeffery Hodges

    * * *

    Posted July 17, 2014 at 6:24 am | Permalink
  9. JK says

    Flight 800 crashed on July 17, 1996.

    Yeah I realize that Henry. So I happened to be six minutes ahead of the 17th anniversary date … I’d been given to understand certain sorts of radars’d been turned on. Making stuff inevitable

    http://20committee.com/2014/07/18/on-shooting-down-civilian-airliners/

    Posted July 18, 2014 at 11:18 am | Permalink
  10. “Apropos today’s date: Trinity – July 16, 1945”

    “And, Flight 800. (It wasn’t Muammar.)”

    JK, I was just pointing out that the two events did not occur on the same date (July 16 vs. July 17).

    Posted July 18, 2014 at 11:47 am | Permalink
  11. JK says

    Understood.

    Thanks Henry.

    It’s been kinda hectic.

    Posted July 18, 2014 at 12:39 pm | Permalink

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